A True Ghost Story And It's Effects

Many years ago I was a young boy just started in secondary school and much like now I was a loner, happiest in my own or select company.  I had a close female friend by the name of Sharon.  Sharon and I were as close as brother and sister, we shared common interests, we were sat beside each other every day in class and we shared the same sort of silly humour for a good 5 months.  Then disaster struck.

Over a weekend my young life got turned upside down.  Sharon was out riding her horse, fell, broke her neck and died.  I was devastated, all I had left of my friend was her writing on a pencil case.  In my young grief I tried hard to remove it, but ink would just soak through and leave the text stand.  Eventually though I decided the only way to remove her memory from my life was to dispose of the pencil case.  BIG mistake, for several months her image haunted me sitting in front of me in my classes.  It upset me no end as all she ever did was shake her head and disappear.

One night after school it had really got to me and I came home and went to bed early, hoping that when I woke up that I would never see her again, even though I missed her.  I wanted her to have peace.  I woke in the middle of the night to an apparition standing over me.  It was her.  She looked down at me and told me something that has stayed with me all these years and I have tried hard to remove it from my thoughts but subconsciously at least it has stayed with me from that day to this.  It was something that I remembered whilst talking on the phone a few nights ago to Heather and I heard Sharon's voice say it once more.  "You will never find love to settle down with John, you are destined to be single when your dying day comes and you will never have found true love" I've never seen her since.  Though I can still see her face.

From that day until about August I threw myself into proving her wrong, even long after the memories of that day had stopped repeating on me on a regular basis.  As a result I know I have made some bad decisions, but slowly I have put them right.  Now I accept what she says is possibly the truth but the future has many pathways to lead me down and it depends on which route I take next what happens next.  I am stepping into the world as a bachelor with no expectation of romance anymore from anyone.  I am winning the fight to love myself and that is the only relationship that needs to be romantic from here on in.  That may change when everything else I want to do is sorted out.  I believe I already have all the people in my life that I need for a long and happy life and I accept that the part they want to play in my life is the one they are meant to.  I might still flirt a little, that's a natural reaction but nothing will ever be done about it unless they choose it too and they have to make the first move.